I've been putting together a talk on women in the media and the types of images out there depicting women. It has my wheels turning. This blog is meant to make you think. To make me think. As a woman, I've gotten comments like, "You're a great female guitarist." Instead of saying, "Am I not just a good guitarist?" I say, " Thank you so much!" Yes. It is a compliment. But as women, it is time we set the record straight. We need to educate, because men, even the good ones, are unaware of what they are saying and how it effects women.
I decided to interview some female musician friends of mine. I didn't realize that EVERY woman I would interview would have several stories of how they were treated different because they were women. In the moment we don't know how to react. It's important to have some stock answers in our pockets.
"WOMEN ARE EXPECTED TO BE QUIET. THEIR IDEAS AREN'T STRONG ENOUGH."
-Steph Johnson
Steph Johnson is a badass person. She write her own lyrics, chords, grooves and the list goes on. During a practice with hired musicians, one male musician looked over her and made a comment to another male musician on how great the groove was. He assumed it was another male musician that had written it. When Steph set the record straight he said, "Well it sounds like him." What could she have said?
"Because of my shape men make comments on my physical appearance.
I get uncomfortable so I giggle." -Tori Roze
Tori Roze is a force to be reckoned with. Her voice is like a siren and her melodic lines set the stage on fire. She admits that some men will make comments before her show and back pedal after the shows once she "proves herself." What could you say to a man that compliments your physical appearance after watching your show? As women we are raised to appease. We learn to just smile.
After a show a man came up to me and said, "Well I'm not going to listen to your CD but you're pretty so I'll buy it." -Lindsay White
How can you dissect this comment? Not only was this man objectifying, he was throwing Lindsay a bone by "supporting her." He also needed to make note that her music wasn't good enough for him. What could she have said? How could she have said it in a way that he would have heard it and learned from it?
After a show a guy came up to our trio and said, "You guys were great and you didn't even have to be because you are pretty girls."
As women, our image seems to be our worth. How can we make a change?
But Veronica, look at the gains women have made. You can wear masculine clothing on the street and not get stoned to death. Sure, you are still not making the same amount of money for the same amount of work. Sure, you get dismissed in meetings when you have an opinion. Sure, when you google "girl rocker" you see images of women in no clothing with a guitar between their legs. Sure, you are considered bitches when you assert yourselves. But remember, Rome wasn't built in a day. You are making strides. No. That is not enough for me. It's time we level the playing field. I will no longer bow in gratitude for bread crumbs. I'm a woman and I deserve it.